I’m back. I’ve been back since Monday. I’m sorry, I really wasn’t hiding from you. Thing is, I’ve been sleeping A LOT. I’m hoping this isn’t, say, the SARS virus (poor SARS has been overshadowed by Avian Flu, and I fear SARS is feeling a bit like Joey Lawrence - big a few years ago, and trying, yet failing to make a comeback). Rather, I am attributing this to a ridiculous case of jet lag. I slept like a log every single night I was home, and yet a week is not enough time to get yourself used to one time zone…then just to come back to the original one. And as I may have said, I wasn’t sleeping too well for the last month or so anyway, what with late night, Insane Flatmate-annoying phone calls to and from my mother, waiting for Grandma to go.

So, jet lag we shall call it.

Things I Have Done This Week (Other Than Sleep):

1) Made a PowerPoint presentation for pimping the ministry of the church I work for to the incoming college students. It’s set to Shane Barnard’s “Breath of God”, and I have to admit, I’m pretty proud of it. Except that it’s taking me FOREVER. And I still haven’t gotten the timing of the slides perfect yet. I have newfound respect for TV preview and movie trailer editors (though I bet they have much better software than I do). Speaking of TV previews, the “Jam” (Jim and Pam) preview for this season of The Office (US) kills me. Sure, it doesn’t really tell you anything about the show, and how darn funny it is. But it makes me go AW. And I’m a girl. So there.

2) Rewatched several episodes of The Office and Scrubs.

J.D. Inner Monologue: Maybe Elliot’s just not the right fit for me. I mean, I’m the kind of guy who likes stupid movies.

Elliot: Hey! Let’s rent Kangaroo Jack tonight!

J.D. I.M.: ….and I have uncontrollable hostility towards small rodents.

Elliot: …or we could just go shoot rats at the dump!

J.D. I.M.: Dammit, she’s perfect on paper

3) Went on a date. Mary King’s Close on the Royal Mile is actually a great date choice. I highly recommend it. Though I’m still confused as to why there were disco balls in 17th century Edinburgh. Also, cameras were not invented until the 1800’s, apparently.

4) Caught up on my knitting. Mom’s red shawl is coming along beautifully, thanks for asking!

5) Rebought the Ten Shekel Shirt album Much, when I remembered how much I loved it 5 years ago on the Doulos. Quickly remembered how much I really really didn’t like the song “Peace With You”. (Which is okay, since there are many other good tracks on it.)

6) Caught up on all the news from my friend Tim Storey down in London. He’s finally got a new place with an actual living room, though the radiators are under the windows - WHO DESIGNS SUCH HOUSES?! Decided not to ask for a sailboat for his birthday from his parents. Now walking 50 mins each way to work because good GRACIOUS 90 quid a month for a bus pass is outrageous. New job, but no extra cash along with it. Axl Rose may be a douchebag, but Velvet Revolver is actually quite a good band. So he says.

7) Learned how to work the coffeemaker at work/church.

8) Welcomed back my very cool flatmate, who has returned from his Summer trip to South America. Did not cry as Insane Flatmate finally FINALLY left the building.

9) Read a few more pages of JPod. That book is disappointingly not a page turner. But I’m powering through anyway. If you want good Dougland Coupland, please PLEASE read Girlfriend in a Coma. I know I say that a lot, but I mean it.

10) Bought more cheese at Tesco. I have a fear of one day running out of cheese. It would be the worst day ever.

Things I Did Not Do This Week:

1) Properly clean my room. Packing + unpacking + lots of sleep + improperly working washing machine = piles and piles of clothes. Meh. Monday will be my cleaning day.

Anyway. That should satisfy you for this evening. I’m going to make a MAJOR EFFORT to post at least a little something every day this week. How’s that for a teaser? You can make sure I hold to it.

INAPPROPRIATE MATERIAL ALERT: The following paragraph contains language not suitable for young children or the Amish.

In Tomorrow’s Post: The story my mother told at my grandmother’s funeral, about my grandmother. The punchline is Grandma saying: “NOW look at me! I look like a f—ing canary!” (Except she edited it in the actual funeral.)
So be sure and show up tomorrow.

Michaela